Bullied

One of my bad memories from childhood perhaps, the worst, was that I was bullied. That's one memory that really stick out in my mind. Violence against children by their peers or classmates has received little attention here in the Philippines, possibly due to the perception that bullying and fighting among children is part of a child's growing up. Sure you heard you parents say "away bata lang yan" which has become the common excuse. Yeah, petty fight among kids are just normal but to be bullied was different. The situation is something to be pitied about. A situation which a kid shouldn't go through. It isn't normal or a rite of passage for children. My memory takes me back to the days when going to school was a nightmare. I felt awful about myself. It was not easy to speak up about my situation to my parents thinking that it would make the situation much more worse, I am afraid they might retaliate for doing so. The bullies won't talk to me. As though it was below their dignity to do so. They laugh at me everyday. They did mean things to me. Why was I bullied by the way ?  Because I am boyish, thin, less bright ( I am a late bloomer you know) and the crush of the head bully's  crush ( she envied me for being beautiful, haha). Even my friends turned their backs to save themselves from this tyrannic bullies. I had no idea how to stand up for myself. I suddenly lost interest in going to school. I would make excuses just so I couldn't go to school. It changed my life.  Day by day, I became increasingly walled-off. That's how I became the loner type. No one wants to befriend me. I found my escape through books, the only place I could escape to. By the time I reached highschool, it was hard for me to coax myself out of my shell. It was a dreadful experience. Thank God, slowly, I was able to to build my confidence and improve my fragile self-esteem. My experience explains why I had no close friends. If I could only turn back time. I should have done something about it.